Why success doesn’t silence suffering—and how therapy can help

In my work as a trauma-informed psychotherapist and integrative coach, I support a wide range of clients from all walks of life—each one navigating their own complex emotional landscape. A portion of my practice is dedicated to supporting ultra-high-net-worth individuals and public figures navigating complex emotional landscapes, while I also reserve space for clients seeking low-fee services—because healing should be accessible, and every story matters.

Success looks different for everyone. Whether you’re leading a company, raising a family, building a creative career, or simply trying to hold it all together, the pressures of modern life can take an invisible toll. Emotional suffering doesn’t discriminate—and neither does the need for support. While this post explores the often-overlooked struggles of high achievers and high-net-worth individuals, the themes are universal: disconnection, burnout, performance pressure, and the quiet longing for more meaning, more peace, more you. This post speaks specifically to those who appear to be thriving on the outside, yet feel adrift, anxious, or unfulfilled within. My hope is that, wherever you find yourself, you’ll see reflections of your own experience here—and feel less alone.

In my work with driven, high-functioning individuals who’ve built extraordinary lives—yet quietly wonder why it still doesn’t feel like enough, there are some common themes…

From the outside, they have it all. The accolades, the assets, the lifestyle. High-achieving professionals and ultra-successful individuals often appear untouchable—leading with confidence, accumulating wealth, juggling influence and ambition with practiced ease. But behind closed doors, many quietly endure a different reality: the emotional toll of success, the pressure of public scrutiny, and the silent burden of expectation.

At my private psychotherapy and coaching practice serving clients in New York, Montana, and worldwide via telehealth, I work with high-net-worth individuals, executives, creatives, and public figures who carry invisible stressors beneath their polished exterior. Despite outward accomplishments, these clients often struggle with complex emotional challenges that are easily overlooked or misunderstood—even by those closest to them.

It’s easy to imagine that life is ideal for these individuals, and to even envy them at times…

Many high achievers craft a life that appears ideal on the surface—by all external measures, they’ve “made it.” The home, the career, the family, the recognition. From the outside, their world looks curated and complete. And often, they’ve worked tirelessly to make it so. But beneath this carefully constructed life can exist an emotional reality that feels vastly different: a quiet emptiness, a sense of disconnection, or an ache they can’t quite name.

This dissonance between how life looks and how it feels can be disorienting. It can also be incredibly isolating. The imagined life—the one everyone sees or assumes—is filled with structure, success, and stability. But the lived experience may be marked by exhaustion, numbness, relational disconnection, or a deep yearning for something more real. It’s not uncommon for clients to whisper in session: “I should feel grateful, but I’m not happy. Why does it feel like something’s missing?”

Let’s begin with therapy. What is therapy?

Therapy, also known as counseling and psychotherapy, is a short-term or longer-term process in which a patient or client works with a licensed mental health professional to resolve problem beliefs, patterns, feelings, behaviors and relational patterns. Therapy tends to focus on past traumas, experiences and issues that are interfering with one’s sense of self and life-satisfaction. Therapy guides patients through the process of self-discovery, uncovering the internal conflicts and dynamics that keep them from having a more satisfying, meaningful and successful life.

Yes, personal coaches and therapists tend to help clients with similar problems, their work is not the same.

What is life coaching?

In life coaching, a client works with a coach who may or may not be a healthcare professional to clarify goals and identify barriers to success in order to create an action plan to move forward. A life coach focuses on where the client is in their life and helps them to create an action plan to work towards their goals.

The challenges that keep us stuck…

When you are feeling stuck, overwhelmed or challenged by a particular situation, or life in general, you may be considering seeking professional therapy or coaching. You have so many options now especially with online virtual therapy and coaching, and of course, helpful websites like Psychology Today, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed.

“Giving Up My Anxiety Will Negatively Impact My Success.” Is This You?

Like most New Yorkers, your days are busy with work, family and trying to find a way to manage and balance it all. With all that striving and the many tasks to complete, who has time to think about stress reduction or connecting with a therapist to help you manage your anxiety and mood symptoms. You may even wonder who you’d be without your drive—and your anxiety! Take away the anxiety and you’d potentially lose your edge.

You may not even consider your striving to be an anxiety response. As a therapist, we see this a lot. You haven’t crashed yet, and we would like to help you have an even better quality of life. If you haven’t yet crashed, how can you tell if your level of stress and anxiety is normal? Skillful therapy can help you recognize how your stress, anxiety and unconscious beliefs are behind your super-charged drive. If you spend any time on instagram, you’ve likely heard of high-functioning depression, as well as high-functioning anxiety.

Making the decision to begin therapy is a significant and empowering step. But for many in New York City—where therapy options seem endless—the process of choosing the “right” therapist can feel overwhelming, even paralyzing. Whether you’re seeking therapy for yourself, your relationship, or your family, understanding the landscape of available approaches can make all the difference.

If you’re unsure where to begin, a helpful resource is The Huffington Post's article on different types of therapy, which offers an introductory look at several major modalities: Psychodynamic Psychotherapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Family Therapy, and Group Therapy. While not exhaustive, it’s a useful starting point for understanding how therapy styles align with specific mental health needs.

Therapy Is Not One-Size-Fits-All

At Holistic Therapy & Wellness NY, we frequently hear from individuals and couples who have tried therapy before and felt it “didn’t work.” Often, the issue wasn’t therapy itself—it was a mismatch between their needs and the therapist’s approach.

• If you’re struggling with self-defeating or self-sabotaging patterns, Psychoanalytic or Depth Therapy can help uncover unconscious motivations that drive behavior.

• If your concerns revolve around anxiety, panic, or trauma, evidence-based treatments like EMDR, Somatic Psychotherapy, and Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy can be transformative.

• Couples in conflict should seek a therapist trained in Couples Therapy, ideally using structured methods like the Gottman Method, Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), or Imago Relationship Therapy.

• For high-achieving professionals, creatives, and public figures in NYC, a discreet, holistic approach that integrates neuroscience, somatic healing, and emotional intelligence is often most effective.

How To Choose The Right Therapist In NYC

While directories like Psychology Today can help you browse local therapists, sometimes a brief phone consultation isn’t enough to make an informed decision. Many of our NYC clients find that a paid consultation with an experienced, licensed psychotherapist provides the clarity needed to choose the best therapeutic path. In these consultations, we explore your goals, challenges, and preferences, and make personalized recommendations tailored to your emotional, relational, and nervous system needs.