Well+Being Holistic Mental Health
“Emotional Health & Wellness Tips From The Therapy Couch And Other Places”
Difficult People: Saving Yourself From Crazymakers In Your Life
We all have challenging people in our lives. The individuals who ignore our boundaries, seek constant attention, create drama, set traps, and leave a trail of destruction, ultimately causing us to feel confused, invalidated, and overwhelmed by the resulting chaos. If this sounds familiar, you are likely struggling to manage difficult people in your life. Sometimes, avoiding these individuals is not an option, which presents a real challenge. They are your exes, colleagues, friends, siblings, parents. Perhaps your life demands regular contact with them, leaving you with feelings of dread and terror and sometimes actual physical symptoms.
Difficult people drain your energy and consistently engage in controlling, destructive, manipulative, and reckless behaviors. They leave a path of destruction in their wake.
They often create traps for you, making it appear as though there is no way to win. They demand attention and create drama and more drama. Their behaviors show up as excessive negativity, anger, aggression, addictions, recklessness, splitting (extremes of good/bad), pathological envy and jealousy, grandiosity, trap-setting, gaslighting, and sabotage. They may already have an actual psychiatric diagnosis, such as Histrionic, Borderline, Narcissistic, or Antisocial Personality Disorder, and behaviors symptomatic of trauma, abuse, and substance abuse.
You experience fatigue and you’re overwhelmed from being in their negative vibration, and the practical aspects of cleaning up their messes can feel daunting. They don't care who they hurt with their aggression and their destructive nature, even their children. You may even wonder if you are the crazy one as they engage in projection, shaming, and blaming behaviors. Essentially, they play the victim, turning things around in a nanosecond. What follows are some important things to remember: